Back to Article index To print this page, click on the Print icon in your browser.    Soar With Your Strengths   "Don't try to teach a pig to sing – it wastes your time and annoys the pig."   This may bring a smile to your face. Don't stop at being amused, though. There is a deeper message. It really goes to the core of some basic teachings and philosophies prevalent when I was going to school and I'm sure things haven't changed much.   Throughout your life, you've found things you were good at and things you were not so good at. As a child, maybe you were good at hopscotch or baseball. When you found something you were good at, you played at it often and loved it! The things you were less adept at, you played less and enjoyed less.   In school, maybe you were good in math and not reading. Or perhaps your passion was in science and not French. From the very earliest training most of us got, the lesson was: "If you're good at something, spend less time on it. After all, you can already do it. Instead, let's focus your attention and energy on where you need help – the things you don't do well. The things that don't come easily to you. That way, you can be more well rounded and enjoy more of your life."   Unfortunately, most often the lesson backfires. We are less proficient in all things – mediocre in everything.   Focusing on a weakness in hopes of making you "better" ignores the reality we just can't be good at everything. Each of us has natural talent. If we accept and acknowledge it, our talent can be our greatest asset.   Consider the Chinese Olympic ping-pong team: Their formula for continued success and medals is to practice eight hours each day perfecting their strength. The philosophy is if you perfect your strengths and develop them to the maximum, they overwhelm your weaknesses. The champion Chinese player has a deadly forehand and he practices only this stroke. He cannot play backhand. It doesn't matter to his game; his forehand can't be beaten and he continues to reign as champion. This is a perfect model for the power we have when we use our strengths.   The sad part is most people don't even acknowledge their strengths. Most of us continue to work to minimize our weaknesses – struggling to get better at what we're not naturally good at. Worse, we have a tendency to discount what comes easily to us - if it's too easy it must not be valuable. If we're not struggling, how can it be good? This may be one of the greatest lies we tell ourselves and it's time to get past it.   Look at your own life and what you're doing. Are you using your talents? Are you doing things you don't like or that you're not good at? Are you living a life that allows you to use and enjoy your natural talents?   You have what you need to make changes that allow you to stop struggling and start living more effortlessly by using your strengths and allowing them to overwhelm your weaknesses. Start by making a list of all your strengths, even things that seem insignificant to you. These could be qualities your have (honest, happy, spiritual), things you do well (conversation, sing, needle work) or ways of being (supportive of others, helpful, people-oriented). Ask the people close to you what they see as your strengths. Write them all down and next to each strength identify what the benefit is to you when you acknowledge and use this strength. Then evaluate your life and see where you are not honoring yourself – perhaps by denying your strength or working with a weakness instead. Identify what changes you can make to allow your natural talent to be part of your life. Then make them.   This is a process and will require total honesty from you. You don't have to share what you're doing with anybody. This is really about you acknowledging yourself. As you continue the process of self assessment, you will start tapping into your personal strengths more easily and more often. Instead of forcing yourself to do what you're not good at, you'll learn to find other ways – either through other people or new options – to get those things done.   Trust in yourself and the process. You will be stronger for yourself, your friends and family and in your profession. Follow the lesson of the Chinese Olympic ping-pong team. They are a model for what it means to soar with your strength! It is possible to have an effortless life when you decide to stop pursuing an impossible dream of wanting to be able to do it all. Just imagine what that might be like for you!     © Copyright August, 1997. Laura Hess, MCC 702.252.3657